If I would of had time

This year, I would of tried to make another easter cake, I really would I was so happy with this one I mad a few years ago!!!!

Happy easter

Hope you all have a great weekend!!!!

AAAWWW

AAAAWWWW a photo of my princess sleeping on my bed. I love her when she is nice and quiet like this :-))

First family bbq of the year

Today is such a beautiful day, the sun is shining and the skies are blue, so we decided to have a bbq!! But when we aere enjoying the spring heat our poor puppy was over heating so we filled a paddling pool for him and he was much better!!! Its just a taste of warmer weather and he was struggling poor baby!!!  We had a great night and was nice for my children to be home for it too as we hardly see our youngest these days.

Busy busy

Today I am going to try leave mine in my garden as I am busy busy busy cutting back mowing and painting the inside of my shed a datk purple as I would love to have somewhere to sit stitch and read in the summer!!! wish me luck"""

Back at the beach!!

Tonight it was beautiful so we took Jensen for a walk along the beach!! well, he came home stinking haha i love it he is never white for long!!! my furry little pudding!!!!

Stitchy update

Here is how my supernatural stitching is coming along :-)) All the out lines are now done so its much easier to sit and watch all 3 seasons of game of thrones, and I have to be honest im loving it :-))

Spring clean time

I want ot have a good think about every area of my life, from my house to the people in it. A clean start is the best step forward. Time to leave the past where it belongs and look to the future. Time to be me and not mammy as my boys are growing. 

Chilli and walking dead.

My friday this week is cooking up a big pot of chilli and playing walking dead on the ps3 :-)) hope you all have a good weekend xx

A subject close to my heart!!!

Our kitties are driving us mad at the momment, they will insist on sharing the bed!!! lucky we love them to bits!!!

We are still in!!!

So here is my happy pic!!!! I am a very happy girl today!!!!

Champions league night

This may just happen to me tonight of we lose our game, so I had better keep all my fingers crossed for a good result!!! Come on Chelsea we can do it!!!!!!

Memories :-))

Came across some of these that I used to make the other day, ah memories, theres so much competition out there over making everything these days I dont know if it would be worth while to start up again.

Lazy sundays

Theres been a few emotional days this week, so with that in mind as there is just so much going on I would need hours to blog it!! Iam going to cwtch up with hubby have a quiet one and watch a movie. Hope you are all enjoying your weekend xx

Saturday nights :-))

I spend most of mine playing singstar, rock band and guitar hero on my ps3 I loves it!!!!

OOOPPPSSS

See I told you I wouldnt be able to control myself!!!! Love my supernatural loads :-))

My first big finish of 2013

Finally all done!!! and I am just so proud of myself!!! I couldnt wait to share :-))

This is a project I want to have finished before the end of the summer, thats if I try really hard not to start something new...now I know I am never going to finish it!!!!

Ok going to try again

Here goes my month of photos!!! fingers crossed!!!!

This is what I need to try and life by from now ao. Its going to be hard work but im hoping I manage it.

Happy mothers day Mam

33 years this year Mam, I wish that you could of seen us grow up and meet my boys, I hope I make you proud I love you so much xxx

WOOOOHOOOO

I dont know how I did it but I did!!! I managed to lose 7lbs this week!!! must be the get fit with Mel B game i bought and nearly into a smaller size too!!! just have to hope i manage to keep it off!!!!!

Happy birthday Leon

My youngest turns 17 today, where has the time flown to? I hope he has a fantastic day I really do one of the last few we will get to spend with him before he is too big I guess xx

Time to say goodbye.

Today we are saying goodbye to my husbands sister, I didnt know her my husband didnt really either as she was his half sister, but we both thought it was important to go and say goodbye. We had a warm friendly welcome from the family we did know. Its always hard saying goodbye such a sad time.

AT the beach

Its not spring yet but is never the wrong time for the beach and our puppy loves it there!!!

REALLY????

How much mess can a teenage boy be comfy to life in in all honesty??? Im sure there is less rubbish on a tip than Leon's bedroom and I for one an sick to death of it and in all honesty Jkaes inst that much better. All these boys do in the house is their own rooms they are far to lazy to help with anything else and they still expect it all... Ive had enough. My hormones have kicked in big time today and between the feeling sick and being in total agony I am sick to death of everyone and everything. It would be wise to run the otherway if you see me coming for the next few days I am likely to say what I think rather tahn what I should you have all been warned in advance.

Positive out look, well I tried...

I really did try today!!! I got up I went shopping with my Dad, I did my zumba, chatted to a friend, sat with Sammy  for an hour, got my mind set for a new look at a new week, new month.....it don't last long. And I should be used to it really, in all honesty is anything in this life as simple as it sounds?? 

It just goes to show what a person put into a situation who doesn't belong there can do to a family and its ripping ours apart. But there's nothing that can be done about it. I keep being told oh it will fizzle out, but I really don't think it will, once you mix with poison it rubs off on you and is harder and harder to pull away from it no matter how bad it gets. Time to turn a blind eye or its going to continue to eat at us all. Playing Chinese whispers so it says just with the people you want. 

Here's hoping for a better day tomorrow x

last day

Today has been another quiet lovely day a time to zumba first thing, yes I know on a sunday too!!! I amazed myself as my wrist and shoulder are just so painful this morning I didn't think I would be able to if I'm really honest.

 Leon has decided that he is staying out tonight even thought it is a college night, he doesn't start until 12.20 though so I am going to see how it goes, I have warned him though he is to come home and have a shower and get changed before he goes as I have not seen him since he walked Altanta to the train station Saturday evening at 6.20 boy my kids are growing up too fast :-((

Any way my picture for today is one of the gifts that Leon got me for xmas, I really loved playing Dante's inferno on the PS3 so he bought me my own Dante and I love him!!! So I wanted you to see :-))

Happy Saint David's day

I would like to wish everyone a very happy Saint David's day we have already had cawl and welsh cakes in the best few weeks and yes I guess I could of kept them for today but never mind :-)) I am going to try something new this month which is a picture for every day I'm not sure atm weither it will be something I am doing, somewhere I am or just something I am thinking about we will just have to see how the mood takes me I guess :-))

Tonight we have a very unusual child free night which isn't a bad thing after last night, geess it comes to something when you have to be careful what you say in your own house because your every word and movement seems to be being reported back to someone who apparently doesn't want anything to do with your or your life, confused?? I know I am... but there you go I guess.

 Any way our night was wonderful just chilling and relaxing watching tv together after a cooked a lovely but healthy meal and we shared a bottle of wine. Yes just a bottle I am going to be cutting right back again otherwise this weight is never going any where and all the exercise I am doing will be for nothing, I can do it I have done it before but living here sometimes its just easier said than done.

Fab friday :-))

Waking up to more zumba ahhh this is the life its killing my shoulder mind you but I am loving it so much its just awesome and so much fun :-))

Well you will be pleased to know that I did acually get some stitching in finally!!! Saying that I did have Lilly on my lap and she does love to attack everything I am trying to do!!! but I managed :-)) And I going to try and work on it as much as I can next month try and get it done as its been on going for a little while now :-))

But not tonight its friday!!! which means wine and singing games so good night x

Cawl :-))

I love the day we have cawl because I don't really have to cook, well, apart from the bread babs I did make. Thursday is Leon's football training so its most prob the best night to make it because it will most deffo warm and fill him up after training and Jake acualy made his way home tonight well for the next to nights to acualy seem like he does life here. 

I decided that I would go upstairs tonight to do a little stitching while watching eastenders as hubby had his head in ghosts, seemed like a good plan, until my little fur baby decided he would much rather have a cwtch with his mammy and watch eastenders, stitching 0 Sammy 1 lol 

Half way through half term

Started the day off with more exercise I am really trying to work out more get ready for the summer!!! loves it :-))

Its not been too bad if I'm honest but i think that's down to the fact i have hardly seen the boys lol  seem quite a bit of Leon's girlfriend though and even more of her tonight as she missed her train home and her mum had to come pick her up which didn't make her mum very happy and i can see her point. I don't know the roads where she lives so i don't like driving places I don't know in the dark, guess its time to start driving around more in the day in case  this happens again!!! kids hey I was in the bath when Leon phoned to say what had happened. But she is home and safe now and that's all that matters. Time to relax finally and watch bones and grimm xx

Cooking cooking

Today we walked Jensen over to Lidl I wasn't sure when I went in what I was going to be cooking tonight, but once I went in I decided for the next few days :-)) Jakes not home for most of this week so it shall be quiet around here something im starting to get quite used to. Any ways. I came out of lidls with enough veg to sink a battle ship and make me wish I had taken the car lol when we got back I decided to take out how I'm feeling about a few things atm out on a large selection of veggies and get them all prepared for the cawl I shall be serving for food on thurs and it helped it worked wonders :-)) two hours later and my mood has had an overhaul, well for time being any ways :-))

ZUMBA!!!!

This is going to hurt I know it is as its been a long while what with my shoulder being so bad, but its time I have to do this, I have gotten so lazy apart from walking to the dog that is and I've eaten way more than I should of this last week so here goes nothing!!! Its time to try one of the disks I had from my zumba for xmas.

Jake is sat here shaking his head at me as I am dying on the sofa....lol...he keeps saying what did you expect Mam?? you only went and picked rush...which is the 20 minute disk the shortest in the collection...but..the most intense!!! and even though I am now dying I really loved every minute of it!!! I have missed it so so so much I need to get this back to a regular thing in my lIfe i really do :-)) and I didn't stop there either I went straight into just dance 2014 :-))

Boy the rain really coming down out there tonight i hope everyone stays safe and there is no more flooding xx

Sunday sunday

Its funny how one persons words and actions can change the way you are feeling. Well tonight the plan was a sweet and sour pork followed by a nice night cwtching on the sofa watching a movie or two with my hubby, well it doesn't work that way when your kids don't want you to relax. I have a message from my youngest to inform me he's on the train on the way back from his girlfriends and wont be long at 7.45, I then have another message at 8.00 i have bumped into my mate wont be long, another message at 9.30 gone spinning see you in a bit, final message at 11.05 I know this is short notice but don't wait up see you tomorrow....16 going on 26...way to ruin my night ggrrr why not just say your staying out in your earlier message, did I mention its the first night of half term???  I give up I'm going to bed!!!!!

The day after

Last night was fantastic and I am still smiling, it was just so nice to spend time with people who like and want to be around you because they just want to :-)) Leon was up early and off to football this morning and I am going to have a nice relaxing afternoon playing my new games and eating some chocolate and drinking coffee!!! Hope you all have a great saturday :-))

Happy birthday to me!!!!!

So here it is my year day of being 30 something before I hit the big 40!!! We have a rule at our house on your birthday morning you are only allowed your cards, pressies have to wait until tea time so you can have your cake and happy birthday song at the same time, so for me this wasn't a very good start to the day as Jake had decided he didn't want to get me one (to add to the not wanting to spend any of it with me) but I did receive beautiful cards of my hubby, Dad and youngest. I did get to play the games I had bought with the money my dad had given me though as they where on the ps3 yes naughty I know but it is my birthday!!!!!

My and my hubby went down to morrisons this afternoon to get in the few things for this evening that we still needed and then we came home when he cooked me a lovely fish and chips dinner with a cheeky glass of wine saying that it was around 4 pm lol and it is my birthday after all!!! Leon came home not long after and I got to open my pressies which I love very much and will surely keep me busy!!!

It wasn't long before we got all dressed up and ready to party :-)) and our friend came down for the evening bringing with him a very large box of choccies and two bottles of wine you are welcome any time!!!! I've had an awesome day for a change and didn't let anyone spoil it for me maybe this is a new start of things to come :-))

Almost there

Half way through the week and just one more day then its my birthday and this year I am actually starting to think it will go to plan, oopss that's done it, something or someone is already planing to spoil it for me as usual, now I mustn't start to think like that, I am going to do my best to make the most of my last birthday in my 30's :-))

I still have a blurry headache I am just starting to think it is something I am going to have to start getting used to as part of this condition but I am not taking any more pain killers that's for sure I just want to see if it can go on its own before Friday as I have a party to get through :-)) 

Day 4

And yes its still there, oh well. cant sit and dwell on the fact I guess I just need to get up and moving and see if that helps. So that's just what we did we took Jensen for a nice long walk to try clear my head. We did see some daffodils does that mean spring is officially trying to show us herself?? I do hope so I think we have all just had about enough of these 100mile an hour winds rain rain and more rain and flooding. Please mother nature we would love some nicer weather if you don't mind :-)) I don't remember the last time the winds where so damaging we have had several roads closed by us over the last week and buildings damaged not to mention how rough its been at the coast. My heart goes out to all those across the country that have been flooded as this happened to me as a child it is one of those things you will never forget and hope to only go through in your lifetime once its just so awful.

Day 3

And this headache just doesn't seem to be shifting anywhere, gonna be a long day I think.

Sunday blues

I went to bed last night with a headache and its still thumping this morning, I really hope this doesn't drag out over a week again these hormonal ups and downs are really beginning to get to me I for one will be just so glad when this hospital appointment finally arrives and they can do something to help me at long last. I got up to Leon playing GTA with Atlanta via psn while talking on skype these kids make me laugh its just so cute to see young love blooming the way they are and to see at least one of my boys happy and smiling in a relationship its just great :-)) 

Feeling brave tonight!!

Since I have had a few accidents from falling over the last 10 or so years with the last being the worst I have a terrible fear of falling and sometimes this gets me down. I know its not an irrational fear as I know the reasons behind it, but it seems to take over my life sometimes and this one is starting to get me down a bit if I'm more than honest as I have so many pretty shoes with heels that I am just so afraid to wear. Learning more and more this year that life is far too short I really must learn to start thinking about things and doing something about them, so saying that, I am walking around tonight in my high boots with heels to see how I go. We all have to start somewhere right???

Happy valentines day

To all those who celebrate this holidays, as for myself and hubby yes we shall be having a lovely meal and a few glasses of wine, but hey its friday night!!! and afterall thats what its for :-))

The day before

As a couple I don't think we have ever really done valentines day, I guess we try to show each other every day that we love each other and there shouldn't be just one day a year reserved for buying gifts and telling each other I love you or spending a romantic evening together, each day should try to be that little special and filled with love and romance, but then again we all know what is best for each of us I guess. So for all those who enjoy the holidays I hope you have a wonderful day and for the rest of us I'm sure we will carry on spending it the way we always do :-)) 

Baking

As I am in a baking mood and it is almost valentines day after all here are some welsh cakes I made earlier all heart shaped :-)) and I managed to take a quick photo before they were all eaten up!!!!

Family news

Today I got to spend some time with my Dad I went out shopping with him, but he is not well again. The condition he has in his chest has spread from the bottom of one of his lungs to fill it all the last tests he has had in the hospital have confirmed. I have got so close to my dad the last 10 years I dont like seeing him suffering as much as he is and I wish there was something more I could be doing for him. But I do all that I can to help when ever he does need me. So I guess I am doing everything I can in some way.

Stitchy update

I have spent a lot of time stitching on my wolves this evening, I am trying to get them finished as soon as I can there just doesnt always seem to be time when I have so much other stuff I want to do, its so dark its hard to justify putting on lights just for me to stitch im so looking forward to summer!!! I will post a photo in the next few days for you all to see.

Lazy sundays

And thats what I love about them, dont get me wrong I do get up early most sundays and I do cook a meal for my lot but I also love the fact that if you dont want to, you dont have to leave the house :-)) Hope you all get a lazy sunday too 

Sporty saturdays

Well more rugby and footie on today, Wales did really badly but thats ok I guess you cant win them all!!! At least Chelsea won and at this time we are sitting on top of the league :-)) big smiles from me :-)) This evening we are going to get up off our bums and play sports champions on the ps3 which I am really looking forward to even though I know I am gonna have sore arms tomorrow!!!! Enjoy your night!!!

PADDLING!!!!

Well at least the weather kept its word!! It was acually dry and the sun came out, was windy and cold but we managed to take Jensen for a walk across the beach. It was the first time we had taken him when the tide was in and although he was a little unsure of the water at first, he was soon diving in and out getting very wet!!! Which made for a wet dog/ sea smelling car on the way home haha but was great to watch him having so much fun!!!!

The dry weather didnt last long though and the winds and rain where back by evening, it was just lucky we had decided to clean up the garden a little and turn the trampoline upsaide down before it did. Ah well time to relax with a nice big glass of wine and spend some time with my boys xx

Still raining

Another cold wet dark day, I feel so sorry for Jensen theres just  no way we can take him out in this weather. Dont get me wrong we are wearing him out playing with him in the house but its just not the same, they are saying we are in for a break tomorrow sooo im keeping my fingers crossed we can take him to the beach :-)) 

At least its nearly all back!!!!

I love us tv shows I have a big list of them I just cant get enough of and tonight I am happy to see the return of Bones and Grimm two of my many faves :-) Its just a shame we get them so long after they have been on in the states as most of the time I managed to read most of the stuff thats happening from my facebook friends but there you go cant be helped I guess!!! So im off to cwtch up with hubby and sink into tv land for the next few hours :-))

WET WET WET

What a nightmare start to my day....went to go out in the car and it was like something possessed... I tried to start it up and all I had was lights flashing doors looking and unlocking and no going anywhere...yeap batteries gone £75 also gone to replace it, oh the joys of motoring.....

Thats all it seems to be doing, rain, rain and more rain.... roll on summer its so dark depressing and wet ive had enough already.....

Games night.

With hubby having a relapse with his eyes last few days and spending most of today in bed, Leon and I decided to play pictionary on the ps3,well, as a person who cant draw a straight line with a ruler, having to use a pen and pad to try draw on the screen was well entertaining to say the least!!!! The drawings where well hard to make out and nothing like they should be!!! But it was so much fun and we laughed so hard I loved it!!!

A quiet sunday and some stitching

1. 

So its no secret I like supernatural so I have charted my own chart through a photo I found online using my pc stitch, I would love to buy one as there are no official ones I cant so as Im not using this for profit in anyway I don't think there is anything wrong with what I am doing. Here's how its looking atm.

Rugby days!!

Yes!!!! the rugby was back on today!!!! WALES WALES WALES!!!!! I do so love the rugby a chance to be loud and happy!!! even if its on too early to have a beer or two and really enjoy it!!! And we did win but we also could of played a whole lot better!!! still loved it though :-))

I also got a chance to meet Leon's girlfriend properly today and she seems like a nice friendly polite girl and hopefully he has made a better choice with this one that his brother has made, but that's up to him I love to have another girl in the house I'm not so out numbered then lol but I am going to be a bit more careful this time around once bitten and all that which is a real shame that someone can hurt you that much that you have to be this careful x

I also had to pay my car tax today, thankful this car isn't a quarter of the old price but I wish I could see what I was paying for as to drive around there you are all over the road avoiding the holes!!!

I also learned a few things about two different people today from my past, I'm not going into it into to much detail but I will say, what goes around in one case, and in the other, if you had spent more time doing these things with your own you wouldn't need other peoples to make up for it now. Looking back I am much happier where I am now than I was around either of you anyway.

Bathing the dog!!

With all this wet weather my little pup is black instead of white!!! the back garden is a mud bath, it seems like Im fighting a constand battle to keep my wooden flooring clean between him and the cats sooo it looks like he needs yet another bath!!! Why is it though I always seem to be the wettest when its done!!!

I decided on lasagne for tea tonight with a nice big glass of wine!! well it is Friday night after all, followed by some greenday rockband with my boys :-))

Where's it all going??

Where is this year going?? one more day and it will be February. You know you are getting old when the months just seem to be flying by!!! I was a good girl last night and after baking a cake some bread and making food I did sit and redo all the work that the frog had made me pull apart, and my second wolf is acualy starting to look like a wolf!!! It's going to be a long while before its all finished though, it's just so big with so many colour changes, but it will be done this year!!! well fingers crossed!!!

CBB final night!!!

Tonight is the cbb final and I am sooo looking forward to it, I really would like to see Dappy win but I can see Jim Davidson walking away with it. But there you go he has been quite entertaining I guess lol. I have my wine chilling in the fridge and I am cooking pork in red wine sauce with garlic mashed potatoes and green beans hhhmmm :-)) the only problem is I know its going to take ages to cook and I'm going to be starving!!!!!!

AARRRHHHH

Well, after yesterdays event I am having a quiet day and this evening I tried to do some stitching on my wolves to relax me while I watched some tv with hubby, and it was all going so well too, until that was I noticed I had made a mistake right at the start and had to pull nearly all of it lose!!!! stupid, stupid frog gggrrrrr ah well it did help me relax for a while I guess!!!! 

Really don't understand some people.

After such a great day yesterday, today has left me feeling disapointed, I will never understand how or why people can be so nasty and hurtful towards those you are supposed to want to love and protect I am just so angry.

It started when I got a phone call from my Dad. He had been down to see my mothers mother, for those of you that know me well enough will know that my mother passed away 33 years ago this way from breast cancer but my father does sometimes still drop by to see my grandmother. My mothers sister has terminal cancer and was given a few years to live a few weeks ago she has it in her spine, neck, lower back and has shadows on the lungs and her hip. She has been for a brain scan but luckily that is all clear at the moment but she really hasn't been very well the last few weeks. Which is why I don't understand how her own mother can sit there and say that there is nothing wrong with her and she is just looking for sympathy. This is your only daughter I don't understand why you can say such a spiteful, nasty and hurtful thing.....shouldn't you be there to support her and help her through it all?? You have already lost one daughter to this awful deasease. I'm lost for words at the fact you show no motherly love towards your daughter.

When my mother died my grandparents stepped in and took us from our Dad as he had nursed my mother at home up until the day my mother died. I never understood what really went on back then after all I was only 6. I was close to my gran even when she put me down, told me what I should and should'nt be thinking and doing, even when I had my own children she would try to correct me and if I told one of them off in front of her she would cuddle them and make it look like everything I was doing was wrong. It wasn't until we fell out and I took a step back I could see for myself how controling she was and how often she had come between my husband and myself as she never really liked him. It was one of the best things I ever did and I cant see myself running back to her after all of this. 

I guess there are some people who just are I don't know what the best word that even describes it is, self centered maybe, there are too many of them around, I'm just glad I am not like her. Well at least I really hope Im not.

Super sundays!!!

Today is going to be a great Sunday!!! First off I am cooking a Sunday dinner which is one of the best things about a Sunday a lovely roast hhhmmm today is pork with apple sauce. Also there is footie on the telly so I will just get to sit relax and enjoy :-))

Tonight there is also a big brother eviction, the last one before the final on Wednesday I don't usually watch the celeb big brother but this time round it has really been amazing and I have loved every minute of it and I am going to miss it so much when its over.

Saturday nights!!

I may have mentioned this a million times!! but I really do love the weekends I love spending time with my Dad and step mum on a Saturday and relaxing in the afternoon before having a glass of wine and cooking a meal and then getting to do some karaoke. It may not be everyone's idea of a good time but I love it. I thought I would show you a picture of the pineapple gateux I made this afternoon, because if I didn't take a photo  no one would see it it will go so fast!!! Hope you all have a great weekend!!!

When do you know

I have had the way I live my life decided for me the last 18 years when I chose  to become a mum. But when do you decide  the time is right to start letting your children choose to do what is right for them and stand back and either watch it work out or crumble and be there for support?? Its been a challenging year and its a difficult decison to sit back when you can see what's happening is'nt for the best, but sometimes that's just what you have to do. When it seems like you are less and less important to someone does that mean its time to start living your life for yourself a little more? or is that you being selfish?? I guess only time will tell.

On another note, am I wrong to think its a midlife crisis for a male friend who is in his late 30's to be chasing after a 19 year old girl?? I seriously don't understand it, maybe its as I have an 18 year old and I still think at that age they are children and don't see how they can be on the same wave lengh. But I seriosly just don,t get it, especially when from what I can understand it seems that this girl will only spend time with my friend if she takes other girls the same age as her with her when ever they do see each other, its like he is one of the Dads driving the girls around, this is just what I think but I just don't understand it at all.

And looking back on everything today's has taught me I think my homornes are slightly outta wack today so I think I better leave it at that.

Rainy again

I know its winter, and yes I know its Wales, but really!!! what is with all this rain and winds it feels like we are acually living in the game heavy rain :(( roll on summer long warm days and sunshine....yesterday really was lovely but once a week just isnt enough!!!!

Sunshine and the beach!!!

Wooohooo!!! the sun came out at very long last!!! so what did we do??? BEACH!!!! yeap we took Jensen to the beach for a walk while we could :-)) It was cold but oh so nice to finally be able to get out for a bit with out getting wet and a double bonus for the puppy as he loves the car.

 So we spent a lovely few hours trying to wear him out, didn't work mind you but he seemed to have a ball, Ah well hopefully we can get out again before the rain comes back and spoils our fun again!!! We are so very lucky to live this close to the beach. 

More rain

Starting to sound like a broken record here but yeap its still wet!!! Its just so depressing I feel sorry for the puppy as he is still waiting to go out for a walk but there's just no point everything is soaking and this rain seems never ending. But tomorrow we are supposed to have a break!!! they are saying we are going to have some sun!!! I know I can hardly believe it myself!!! Time will tell we shall see x

A day of cleaning and heartache

So I plan to get all my cleaning done today so I can have tomorrow off haha like that's going to happen with this weather and a puppy back and fore through the back door bring muddy paw prints through the house every few hours...but I'm gonna try any ways. Well I dusted all the shelves down and pulled down Buds pedigree certificate that upset me, just stood there with tears in my eyes thinking of him remembering him, hitting me this is the second birthday I spend without him, I love and miss him so so much :-(( Then I got on my hands and knees and started scrubbing the floor, and do you know what?? apparently there was an earthquake. well I have to be honest, I didn't notice it!!! Its a shame I would like to experience it kinda I think lol I do remember one before but that wasn't up to much either.

So I finally have everything all tidy and done when my eldest walks in and decides to upset me. He knows how much pain and hurt my birthday normally brings me and now he has decided to add to it. He has just informed me that he will be leaving Friday morning for college and he wont be home until Saturday evening. I felt like the ground opened up beneath me and swollowed me whole. I know our relationship hasn't been great since he got back with that girl but I know now that he has decided a night playing monopoly with friends is much better than spending any time with me on my birthday so I guess I must learn to let go and except that he is no longer my child and he is an adult in his own right and leave him to get on with his own life and start living mine without him in it so much.

Rainy mondays

Guess what?? yeap...its still raining. Its starting to feel like we are living under water. That's all it seems to do is rain on us. I am longing for the summer now, warm sunny days where you can go out and do stuff instead of being stuck in at home all the time. But wait I will have to as its not even spring yet. Ah well at least I will be ready for the summer as the other afternoon I went into Tesco and they had a large selection of books from 25p so I'm stocked up all ready for lazy days sunbathing in the garden I cant wait!!!

Sunday best

Today has been the best Sunday in ages!!!!!! And I have had an awesome weekend over all. I am so so glad that I thought of me for a change and not had my mammy's head on. I guess I do have to start thinking as a person in my own right and not so much as just a mother these days as my boys are almost all grown up. 

I made a pork roast for dinner today and to actually have it at lunch time rather than late evening when the boys came home made a very nice change :-)) Then I decided to give rock smith a whirl, and I have to be honest I take off my hats to all those out there who can play guitar its so difficult and its going to take me for ever to learn, but I hope I decided to stick with it as I would love to one day be able to play at least one song!!!!

Well I sat down this afternoon to watch the Chelsea v Man utd game after meeting Leon's girlfriend, she seems like a polite girl and lets face it after my eldest Son's girlfriend anything is an improvement, but we will see what happens the more she is around. Leon was wishing he wasn't watching the game after such an awful performance and losing so badly!!! hehe me on the other hand I was sooooo pleased as you can well imagine!!!!

When the game was over we settled down and watched scary movie 5 omg it was soso funny!!! I haven't laughed so much in ages!!! and It wasn't over then either as hubby and I decided to cwtch up and watch grown ups too later tonight with a glass of JD and honey and some munchies I felt so relaxed and happy it was fantastic.

So here's to a wonderful weekend I have enjoyed every moment of it!!!!

Saturday football

Well another Saturday means one last weekend of football on the telly before it gets switched off as the offer is nearly over. Today we are watching the Liverpool game as hubby is a big fan, well I say we, I am actually watching but at the same time screaming at the vita we had for Christmas as it is just so so much harder than the ps3!!! but I shall not let it get to me!!! Hehe. The game was OK Liverpool in my opinion didn't play that great first half and I think a draw was deserved. 

Anyway after the game I cooked the three of us food as Jake was out again, I am starting to get used to only having one here on a Saturday night again just need to lose the other one a bit more LOL no I really do love having my boys home :-))

Another night on the ps3 for me playing singstar on line with my friend Paul, well it gives my boys a break from trying to humour me anyways xx

Let the weekend begin

This weekend is going to be a distraction free weekend, after everything that's gone on this week with Jake and college and everything else I just feel the need to have some fun. So I will start off by having a work out then getting this place clean and shiny all ready for the weekend. 

We decided this afternoon that we would take Jensen for a little stroll over to pets at home as we needed to get a mouse for Pycho any ways and he loves to go in there and meet the other dogs and I wanted to see how he would react to rabbits :-)) I was not expecting him mind not to be bothered by the bunnies but love the fish!!! 

Tonight I have decided to make meatballs for the very first time!! I was suprised they worked out very well and were quite tasty too!! and much cheaper to make than buying them ready done for you so there will be no stopping me now!!!!

Time to put my ps3 on for the evening after the big brother eviction of course and get my gaming and singing on!!!

Not much to say today

Today was just a quiet day, its still raining that's all it ever seems to be doing at the moment so there doesn't seem like much point in going out and trying to do much so I had a nice day at home cleaning gaming and relaxing. Hopefully this rain will disappear soon and bring some sunshine.

More rain and more drama

Well its the middle of the week and almost the weekend again and I am looking forward to it. Not for the same reason as last week just for the break from it all. Today I contacted the college as requested to and I am still us unaware of the problems as I was before I phoned. Surely if they ask you to contact them they should have all the details to hand?? well you'd think anyways, but no of course not and I am asked to wait in tomorrow for them to contact me back. HHmm bet they wont.

 I'm just so frustrated with everything at the moment and yes it would be easy to blame my hormones with the battering they are getting but I really don't think that would help it seems at the moment it is more down to things surrounding Jake. I wish he knew what I going through but as he hasn't asked I don't see why I should have to tell him, neither boys really know and its not that I wouldn't tell them but they just haven't even asked.
I have said a little but it would be nice to see some concern or maybe I'm just over thinking things again.

I had to give Jensen a bath this afternoon as he was black all over his legs and belly instead of white, the water was like a dirty river lol its not his fault this weather is starting to drive me mad its dark its miserable and its starting to match my moods sometimes, I need some sunshine please!!!!

 Never mind there is a big brother eviction tonight and I always enjoy that so that's something to look forward too.

Feeling my age!!!

Boy am I tired today!!! this weekend is really catching up on me, thank goodness its not something we do all the time, but then again, if it was it would be a lot easier I guess as we would be used to it!!! But those days are long gone. 

I had a letter from the college regarding Jake today seems like all his work inst being done the way it should be, ggeess at 18 I'm having more trouble with him that ever it seems, and I am wondering if the stress of resuming his past relation ship is to blame or whether its just the case of he always has his ds or vita attached to him. And I don't know if its better to try guide him or let him live his own life as he is an adult in his own right after all, Kids, hhmm, isn't it supposed to get easier?????

Well I am going to just make a cheese and onion pie sit down and relax if that's possible tonight as I don't know what else I can do oh and work on my wolves I am loving the way they are turning out but I have to be honest the constant colour changing is a bit of a drag.

Monday already!!!!

So today is going to be a quiet one after the weekend we have had!!! mind you it was a whole lot of fun!!! so today I am sharing two of my wips. 

This is how far I have gotten with my Draco to be honest not very as I need sunlight for this and its not exactly what we have been having here but every chance I get I know I should be using it but I just cant seem to make myself work on this atm.

This sis something I started just as we were going into Christmas it is the free face book gift from dragon dreams. I didn't realise how small it was going to be on the aida i picked up as apart from the back stitching this is a third of the way done I should really take a few hours and try to make it my first finish of the year/ We will have to see if I can put my wolves down and get some done on it!!!

Time for round 2!!!

First of all I would like to wish my wonderful husband a very happy birthday. Even though he went to bed very early last night around 12.30am and left me having to keep his very chatty friend company until almost 4am!! Never mind I did get a McDonald's out of it when he got a taxi down there around 3am lol even though I don't really eat it since I stopped working there at that time anything tastes good haha.

Today we are having another full day here. Hubby has the footie on the telly around 4pm so while he is watching that I am going to be baking bread rolls and making some burgers and spicy wedges and of course icing the cake :-) later on this evening we are having a games night where we all get to choose a game and we each spend time playing against each other, well that was the plan.

Well it all started out well, Hubby choose COD which I really have no ideas what I am doing but I did try to join in. Leon then choose WWE  which again I have no clue!!! but still played. Then Jake choose All star battle royal well its safe to say only Jake knows whats going on there!!! Then it was supposed to be my turn..hhmmm..well Jake went on his phone and his mood changed as he claimed he had a headache I still do believe it was more like something he had read as he isn't really allowed to do stuff with us but there you go, so I told him to go to bed. Leon joined in for a bit and then I gave up and just played singstar which I eventually roped hubby into but it goes to show if you don't pick first you usually don't get!!! 

But it was a fun evening up yo that point and then afterwards as well.

Saturday nights!!!

Well today is the day before hubby's birthday so we are having a nice meal and a few glasses of nice wine, well that was the plan anyway and to be truthful it did start out that way but as normal nothing goes as planned at our house!!

We started the day off pretty normally watched the soccer am dance off which was brilliant!!! I loved it!!! Then I baked the birthday cake ready for tomorrow and had a catch up with my Dad and step Mum. We then drove over to lidls and got some bits and pieces in for tonight while Leon was at football and Jake was out. The boys where then both in by 7 o'clock and we had a lovely duck meal, as I'm not too overly fussed on duck it wasn't too bad. Then my hubby's friend who was down for the weekend decided to call over and spend a bit of time with us which while was a lot of fun I am most defiantly getting way too old for these up almost all night parties!!! At least it took my mind of things for a while  :-))

Friday dramas

Well its Friday again, the weeks are coming around quickly again as we start this new year. I had a little bit of a lay in this morning as hubby got the boys up for college which made a nice change but that doesn't mean today is going to be a lazy one. 

We decided today that we were going to take the pup for a nice long walk along the golf course path as he has so much energy at the moment it maybe helpful if we try to wear him out for a little bit. Even though it was dark and cast over, cold and so so gloomy he loved every minute of it!!! A happy bouncy little pup for the whole hour and a half walk it just was a real shame about the weather. 

When we got home Jake was home which wasn't what we were expecting as its Friday and it wasn't even four o'clock yet but the reason for that became all to clear when Leon arrived home. I am not sure what is the best thing to think or say about the incident which I have heard a few different stories on is, but I am quite happy to say again that I do not understand why he is back with this girl as it did nothing but cause problems the last few months of the relationship before they ended It last time. And after her accusing me of saying things yesterday that I wasn't involved in or aware of  I do think if i open my mouth no one is going to like hearing what I do have to say do for now I'm going to leave it.

At least I can escape into the world of big brother eviction tonight before I go to bed and try to forget the whole thing.

Busy busy

Today I have decided I am gonna have a day in and get this place all nice and neat, and yes I am well aware of the time I am going to keep it that way but I have had enough of the feeling sorry for myself and just want to keep busy so all of downstairs is getting blitz including the leather sofas and dining chairs as the weather is so bad here everything seems to be constantly being covered in muddy paw prints, I shall truly be happy to see the weather brake I for one am getting pretty sick of all of this rain and doom and glum weather all of the time!!! 

And after me saying that you know what the sun came out!!! Not for long mind but it did make a lovely change to see that strange looking thing staring down from the sky!!! so we took the pup for a walk to Home bargins while it was out not too far as that wouldnt be fair on hubby with his eyes and we left him of the lead for a little bit on the quary which I am still having to get used to as he is still a pup but he enjoyed it!!! 

I got time to dye my hair tonight before the weekend which was great and tonight I am going to relax and have a glass of wine and try to enjoy myself.  

Time for some answers maybe

Well this morning I have been back to the doctors for the results on my blood tests. I had some sort of idea of what they were going to say but I wasnt quite ready for what they told me. So seems like my body does think that its older than it seems!!! And my ovaries are over producing eggs, so it means I have to go under a gynocologist because if my age, so more waiting to see what happens next!!! I'm getting quite good at that LOL at least I have some answers I guess, good job I really don't want any more children hey.

When I got back form the doctors my Dad was here and I went shopping with him down to morisons, I always like to go down there with my Dad and it gave me a bit of time to stop my brain from working over time!!! Then I spent some time on my ps3 just by myself for a bit and that was nice too.

This evening I managed to get a little more done on my wolves, boy I wish I could get my needles smoking like they used to I have gotten so slow!! But im getting there very slowly!!! 

Hospital visits and shopping!!!

Ok back to up at what feels like the middle of the night time!!!! Its just sooooo dark and this weathers been nuts with the winds, heavy rain, hail stones and thunderstorms!!! Seems like we are living under a constant flood watch too the waves have been crazy at the beach!!! I guess I shouldn't complain as we have been very lucky where we are living, but I have seen a lot of things that have been damaged and after going through being flooded as a child my heart goes out to all those who have been affected in any way.

We are back at the hospital today with hubby's eye check. Even though it hasnt gotten ant worse it hasn't improved either and the pressure is up again, im thinking maybe its had something to do with it being Christmas and having lights but im not completely sure how it all works, I'm just glad it hasnt gotten any worse atm.

This evening I have also had a little bit of time to do some stitching on my wolves, photos will be coming in next few days, and it was fantastic to acualy get some done I really enjoyed it even though the constant colour changing is starting to get on my nerves a bit, kinda reminds me of an old country companions I did.  

To end today I hope everyone stays safe in this awful weather, take care xx

Back to normality!!!

Well, back to early nights and early mornings as the boys are back in college tomorrow so today we treated as our normally sunday which meant a day of not doing anything much so we can let our bodies have a rest before we get thrown back into life :-)) And with hospital appointments and everything else this week its properly the best idea. I dont have much to chat about today as we havent really got much done today!!! But as I said I would write something everyday no matter how little there it is!!!!

Sunday movie night

Well today is the sad day our christmas is packed away, I hate and love this day at the same time. Its sad sayiny goodbye but its also great getting my living room back :-)) I also decided to make a roast for dinner which is another good thing about sundays!!! 

Tonight though is going to be movie night and was  a night one to as the boys arent back at college untill tuesday. We started off with hubbys pick which was 12 rounds 2 I wasnt sure as it is a wwe film but to be honest it wasnt that bad. But my choice I much prefered I choose Beautiful creatures and I really did enjoy it, I had read if you liked twilight you would like it even though it was nothing like twilight I would quite easily watch it again!! 

I hope you all had a wonderful Sunday :-))

Last day of Christmas!!!!!!!!!!

Well at our house anyways!!!! Tomorrow it will all be packed away, Iam always sad to see it all going, but at the same time happy to see my living room again!!! So tonight will be all about fun!!!

But first things first, I have a puppy that needs his first walk of the year!!! Which he really really enjoyed!!! In fact he needed a bath when we got him home because he is a little stinker!!!! But after the last few weeks of not being able to go out through illness then his op, the weather and xmas it really did feel great!!!

And then to spend the evening having a few cheeky drinks and singstar then dancing on the ps3 this girl went to bed with a smile on her face, cant let my body ruin all my fun now can I!!!!!

A quiet friday

Well, i was up nice and early today!!! I'm off to the nurse to have some bloods done, the symptoms that I've had since being told I was in peri menopause last Christmas have gotten so bad in the last 6 weeks I need some answers and some help!!! But now I am going to have to wait until at least Wednesday for the answers but that's ok its only a few days right!!! Maybe once they sort me out I will have some energy to get back to exercising, even though my shoulder still isn't right!! Or maybe even some stitching!!!! Wish me luck!!!!!!!!!!

A day to remember

This is my all time favourite photo of our fur baby Bud, I can hardly believe you have been gone a whole year today. I still miss you tons, and I hope you are giving them hell over there in rainbow bridge just like you used to here. The house seemed so quiet and empty without you and even though I know how much you hated cats I know you where happy to see me smile again. I was so sad without you and I know you would of hated to see me so down, You will always have a piece of my heart baby Mammy loves you so so much xxxx

First day of my book :-))

So here we are, first day of a new year and a clean sheet for a new fresh start!!! so here we go what's first??? Well we had a tradition at our home where we have a new years day party, we didn't have it last year with everything that was going on at the time so this year I thought why not??? so that's exactly what we did. And do you know what it really was a whole lot of fun!!!! We put snacks out and spent all evening playing games together on the ps3 until very late too!!! But the room was filled with laughter and I have realised there aren't going to be very many christmas's like this with my boys getting older so I really have to enjoy every momment xx